The Balancing Act of Love -- AA Ariel

September 2009 message - AA Ariel

The Balancing Act

Our life journey is our path to ascension, with a focus of bring the material and spiritual worlds into balance within us and thus within the world. Part of this journey is experiencing the lessons that we have agreed to undertake in order to arrive at our ultimate destination, the creation of the spiritual human. Within this paradigm we embody spirituality and have completed our mission, releasing polarity and bringing into balance the powers of heaven and earth. So our lifetime is truly a balancing act where we must decide, within each moment, how we will best achieve this.

Sometimes we forget the spiritual side and we act from our humanity, expressing our pain, outrage and frustration with the world, ourselves and other people. Sometimes we take the opposite tactic and ignore our humanity, burying our hurt feelings and becoming a conduit for spirit by trying to be nice and good. But ignoring our feelings does not make them go away and we find new opportunities to acknowledge them. Our struggle is not with being spiritual, we know how to do that, but with being human. And this defines our struggle, which is our attempt to find that place of equilibrium where we are at a place of neutrality, at the zero point between love and fear. We have to choose balance or we are in its opposite energy, revenge.

We look at revenge as the things that we do to hurt others, to return their energy to them in the most hurtful way possible, to get back at them. Bad, non-spiritual people do this; spiritual people do not think about revenge and yet, we do. Because whenever we use our energy to find balance with others so that we feel better about ourselves we are seeking revenge. And this energy is so subtle that we do not even know we are doing it. How does this work?

When we believe someone has wronged us we have two choices, to ignore them or to be nice to them in an attempt to get them to treat us differently. By being nice to them we try to show them the error of their ways, that we are a nice person and they should treat us differently. Ignoring them makes us feel better, to a point, and allows to move on despite our feelings about the situation. Which path is right? It depends on our objectives. By ignoring them we are also ignoring a fundamental spiritual law, the Law of Attraction. We attracted them and their behavior which they are mirroring back to us. Our lesson is to uncover the energy that we hold which allows us to attract that kind of person and treatment.

By being nice to them, despite their treatment of us, we are ignoring another universal law, the law of Vibration, which again points to the energy that we are expressing. We cannot change that particular person’s behavior by being nice to them while they continue to be mean or indifferent to us. We are trying to find balance with someone who is out of balance and doing it by being out of integrity with ourselves. How long can we ignore the fact that this person makes us feel bad and hurts us? When do we stop being nice on the outside when we are crying and angry on the inside? This is our signal to let go of the situation and focus on our inner upset, the hurt child on the inside who is crying out for attention and focus on the bigger picture, this person who is hurting us is simply mirroring our own anger back to us. We need to fix ourselves and we can’t do it by trying to fix them.

But there is another energy at work here, the energy of revenge. Because when we focus on fixing the outside, we are ignoring our own inner imbalances. If our inner world is out of balance, our outer world will be out of balance too. This is how we know what is happening on the inside, by paying attention to what is happening on the outside. We use revenge to fix the outside reality and ignore the real truth, that it is happening on the inside. How do we get revenge? We don’t do it by being mean to them, because our objective is to get them to recognize our goodness. So we are extra nice, thoughtful and considerate. We go out of our way to be kind and ignore their rejection and mean-spirited comments. Even ignoring them is an act of revenge because we are trying to use their energy against them.

And this is a pattern for everyone who tries to manipulate the outside world to look like what they wish their inner world does. But that can never happen because the outside world is an illusion of their own inner reality. We always go against Universal Law when we try to make our outer world prove to us that what we believe on the inside is untrue. So we have to shift our thinking, focusing on the inner world, seeing the clues and truth in the outer world as strong messages to us to correct our thinking, to reconnect to our own power and create balance within.

Revenge is not reserved for bad, non-spiritual people, it is the way we try to tell ourselves that we are good, deserving of love and respect by trying to prove to others that we deserve it instead of by looking within to discover our inner source of powerlessness. Because the need to get revenge is fed by our own feelings of being powerless.

Spirit tells us that we are powerful beyond measure and while we believe that in theory, in fact our reality looks very different. The people who do not love, respect or honor us make us feel powerless and they expose this secret to the world, despite our best attempts to hide it. Nowhere is this more true that in our relationships with family and our intimate partners. When we feel powerless we choose situations that will amplify those feelings, not to prove that it is true but to push us towards correcting our own beliefs and finding our power. We can use those situations to find balance or to get revenge.

How do you know what energy you are expressing? Ask yourself these questions:

Is there someone in your life who is mean, disrespectful and unkind to you and you are trying many different ways to be nice to them so they will treat you in the way you want to be treated?

Do you find yourself saying “I wish they would treat me better” with respect to any person or situation?

Are you in any kind of relationship with someone who makes you feel powerless?

What lengths are you willing to go to in order to get someone’s love and respect?

How much of your energy goes to being nice to people who don’t seem to appreciate it or return it to you?

When you look at where your energy is going, do you find that it is directed towards a person or situation that you are trying to change?

If you can find areas in your life that correspond to these questions then you are seeking revenge. How do you find balance? Look within and find where you are hurt, angry and wanting someone to mirror love to you by proving yourself worthy. You are already worthy of love, you are love and come from love. Love created you and it this inner source of love will redeem you the way no material source of love can. It is what you have inside that is powerful and when you are able to remember to love, honor and respect yourself that your outer reality will reflect that back to you. Find balance by being in integrity with your inner love and you will have all the love you desire, and more.